0-60 in 15 minutes!
100% Irony Free
100,000 Sperm And You Were The Fastest?
186,000 Miles/Second: It’s Not Just A Good Idea, It’s The Law!
3 kinds of people: Those who can count and those who can’t.
7 days with out Jesus makes one weak
A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.
A church alive is worth the surprise!!
A clean car is a sign if sick mind.
A day without sunshine is like, night.
A Day Without Sunshine Is Like, You Know, Night
A fool and his money are a girl’s best friend.
A Mouse Is An Elephant Built By The Japanese
A nuclear war can ruin your whole day .
A nuclear war can ruin your whole day.
A Waist Is A Terrible Thing To Mind
Abandon the search for Truth; settle for a good fantasy.
According to my best recollection, I don’t remember.
According to my calculations, the problem doesn’t exist.
Adrenalin is my drug of choice.
Adults are just kids with money.
Age is a high price to pay for maturity
Air Pollution Is A Mist-Demeaner
Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.
All generalizations are false.
All I want is less to do, more time to do it, and higher pay for not getting it done.
All Men Are Animals, Some Just Make Better Pets
All Men Are Idiots… And I Married Their King.
All my drinking buddies have a racing problem.
All stressed out and nobody to choke!
All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.
Always Remember: You’re Unique, Just Like Everyone Else.
AMERICA-Love It Or Leave It!
Amnesia used to be my favorite word, but then I forgot it.
ANGER IS MERELY DEPRESSION WITHOUT ENTHUSIASM!
Another brilliant mind ruined by higher education.
Anyone can give up smoking, but it takes a real man to face cancer.
Anything Free Is Worth What You Pay For It
Are you following Jesus this close?
As If
As Long As There Are Tests, There Will Be Prayer In Public Schools.
As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
Ask me about micro waving cats for fun and profit.
Ask me about my vow of silence.
Ass, gas or grass, nobody rides for free.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Auntie Em: Hate you, hate Kansas, taking the dog. – Dorothy
Avoid Hangovers; Stay Drunk
Ax Me About Ebonics
Baby on bored
Back the badge
Back Up My Hard Drive? How Do I Put It In Reverse?
BAD COP! – NO DONUT!!!
This is just 2% of them! Read the rest here…